Heh

One of the joys of being retired:  I have to be told that a particular day is a holiday.

Overheard on the radio this morning:

Columbus was the original Democrat:  He didn't know where he was going, when he got there he didn't know where he was, when he got home he didn't know where he'd been.  And he used somebody else's money to pay for it all.

A Definition

ass

1.  a long-eared, slow, patient, sure-footed domesticated mammal, Equus asinus,  related to the horse, used chiefly as a beast of burden. 

2.  any wild species of the genus Equus,  as the onager. 

3.  a stupid, foolish, or stubborn person.

Works for me.